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Dying Well: Peace and Possibilities at the End of Life, by Ira Byock MD
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From Ira Byock, prominent palliative care physician and expert in end of life decisions, a lesson in Dying Well.
Nobody should have to die in pain. Nobody should have to die alone.
This is Ira Byock's dream, and he is dedicating his life to making it come true. Dying Well brings us to the homes and bedsides of families with whom Dr. Byock has worked, telling stories of love and reconciliation in the face of tragedy, pain, medical drama, and conflict. Through the true stories of patients, he shows us that a lot of important emotional work can be accomplished in the final months, weeks, and even days of life. It is a companion for families, showing them how to deal with doctors, how to talk to loved ones—and how to make the end of life as meaningful and enriching as the beginning.
Ira Byock is also the author of The Best Care Possible: A Physician's Quest to Transform Care Through the End of Life.
- Sales Rank: #25877 in Books
- Published on: 1998-03-01
- Released on: 1998-03-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .80" w x 6.00" l, .70 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 320 pages
Amazon.com Review
On his deathbed, faced with creditors and unpaid bills, Oscar Wilde said despairingly, "I am dying beyond my means!" If only the poor, beleaguered genius had read this book! None of us gets out of here alive, but reading this book will lessen your fear of the ultimate end and give you some guidance about enjoying your life to the fullest right up until your final moment. Do people really enjoy life in the face of death? People do. The stories of individuals in Dr. Byock's book will move and inspire you to change your feelings about the end of your life, and also your feelings about your life in the present.
From Publishers Weekly
This study of how to die well displays uncommon vitality. Byock, president elect of the American Academy of Hospice and Palliative Care, is a gifted storyteller. Beginning with his own father's terminal illness, he details without scientific cant the process of decline that awaits most of us. The case studies, which form the humanistic soul of this work, never devolve into the maudlin or saccharine. Life on the edge of the great crossing is explored in all its sadness and pathos, but Byock also makes room for wisdom, hope and even the joy of final understanding. By recounting the passages of patients in his Missoula, Mont., practice, Byock makes a forceful case for hospice care and against physician-assisted suicide. He demonstrates how the physical pain and emotional despair of the dying may be handled. The family constellation of the terminally ill is also analyzed, with emphasis on a hospice's ability, through its doctors, nurses, psychologists and social workers, to help those left behind. Not only is this book informative, especially the question-and-answer section at the end, it is also insightful. Readers will sense Byock's personal growth as his understanding of final issues flowers through a 20-year specialization. Byock recalls his growth from a callow resident to a concerned son and, finally, to a healer with a mission. Whether it's the middle-aged mother who must resolve disillusionment with her sister, the bitter father of three who achieves serenity or the gutsy teenage girl with a rare genetic disease, the people whose sojourns Byock recounts receive from him the dignity they merit. German rights to Kinder Verlag; author tour.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Many terminally ill people fear that their last days will be spent as burdens to their families, helpless, without dignity, and in unbearable pain. Often, the only alternative to such a death seems to be assisted suicide. In either situation, the dying person and family members are denied the opportunity to make the most of their remaining lives. Byock, a hospice physician practicing in rural Montana, learned well the possibilities for dying while caring for his father, who died from pancreatic cancer during Byock's medical training. This book tells the story of his father's final illness and those of hospice patients Byock has helped through the dying process. Focusing on the clinical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of death, the stories emphasize Byock's unshakable belief that physical and psychological suffering can always be alleviated through the devoted efforts of hospice caregivers. He offers realistic yet compassionate answers to the hard questions asked by dying patients, their families, and a society unwilling to accept that all life eventually comes to an end. Highly recommended for all collections.?Karen McNally Bensing, Benjamin Rose Inst. Lib., Cleveland
Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc.
Most helpful customer reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Reduced my fears
By Katy Butler
A reassuring and hopeful guide for anyone new to the process of death and dying -- and in the age of improved public sanitation and advanced medicine, that means a lot of us. Perhaps our great-grandparents wouldn't have needed a book like this, as they witnessed deaths throughout the lifespan. "Dying Well" reduced my fears and informed me: A. about the process of dying,B. what medicine can do to help, C. that once you get over the fact you're dying and can't stop it, you can have people help you meet other goals -- snuggling with your cat, graduating high school, going sailing for the last time, having your gurney trundled into the woods to say goodbye to the trees. (Those are my examples, most of them are not from this book.) I consider this book a pioneering, foundational and seminal text -- I'm amazed it hasn't been reviewed by more people. Given our desire to avoid the subject out of fear and misplaced "positive thinking," we need more books like this to paint the landmarks and fill in the various colors of the landscape of death and dying, especially very slow deaths by "the dwindles" that many elderly people experience now.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Finding Peace at the End of Life
By Amazon Customer
This book has been difficult to read, because facing death is difficult. The manner of our dying is as unique as the manner of our living, and having a choice in the way we spend our final days is important. This book gives a glimpse into the life of hospice physician, Dr. Ira Byock. In it, he shares the stories of patients (including his own father) and families who are "exploring the inherently human experience of dying."
This is a GREAT read for those who are themselves dying, for people who are caring for someone who is actively dying, or for those who are searching for answers; death needn't be a painful, lonely experience.
I was often moved by Dr. Byock's words of wisdom to his patients; that it was okay to die at home, surrounded by family, it was okay to stop eating and drinking if one wasn't hungry or thirsty, it was okay to hold onto those the things which define us; having our nails done, wearing nice pyjamas, smelling good, craving the touch of others, being read to, participating in conversations, feeling valued.
More importantly, this book showed me that there is still a possibility to learn, to heal our minds and hearts, to forgive others and OURSELVES, to express love and compassion, and to find purpose and meaning behind our lives while dying or while caring for someone who is. Spending time with someone at the end of their life, whether the person is conscious or not, is beneficial to all parties involved.
Please read this book, though you may need tissues...and perhaps a glass of wine.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Absolute Must Read IF You or Loved One is Dying
By Descca
This is written by a hospice doctor, giving us the benefit of his years of experience with the dying. The outstanding part of this book is his case study of individual patients and their families during the saga of death. Many a chapter brought tears to my eyes. And it also reads like a mystery story in that you turn the next page to see what is going to happen next. At the end of the book is an invaluable FAQ section (that was worth the price by itself).
I bought the book so as to know how to better relate with relatives that have the big C. I was looking for some understanding of what they might be feeling and how to talk to them, things that I might do to ease their mental anguish rather than add to it by inept, uncaring action. This book delivers in all respects and is one you may re-read from time to time for its striking insights.
All of us are in the process of dying, some of us are just closer than others - keep that in mind and buy this book.
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